The Tools They’ll Need
“The best way they can begin to see how prayer works is by hearing my own prayers to God in times of joy, stress, sorrow, and anxiety. It’s important for us to show them that we can be honest and transparent with God.”
“and take the…sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God, praying at all times in the Spirit…” (Ephesians 6: 17-18 ESV).
My son, Parker, has prayed some funny prayers over the years, especially when he was a toddler. Here is one of my favorite conversations he had with the Lord one night:
“Dear Jesus, thank you for Mama. Thank you for cupcakes. And mama. And cupcakes. I hope I get some cupcakes tomorrow. Amen.”
Kids’ prayers are the best! They aren’t wordy or lofty. They aren’t complicated. Just straightforward thanksgiving for cupcakes and Mama.
My daughter, Avery is hilarious, and she has always been quirky. We started praying with her at a very young age as well. Avery has a pink stuffed rabbit named “Baby.” This poor thing has seen better days. She has been rough on Baby. When Avery was a baby, she would sometimes pick Baby’s fuzz and eat it. I know- not good! And sometimes she would make spitballs with the fuzz. Still not good. One morning when Avery was three years old, I walked into her room to find a nice collection of Baby’s fuzz spitballs on the wall above her bed (pic below).
I. About. Died.
Here was our conversation:
“Avery, what in the world…why did you make spitballs with Baby’s fuzz and stick them on the wall?!”
“I made a cross, Mama!”
And sure enough- there it was. She was so, so proud. My crazy girl had formed a cross above her bed out of Baby’s fuzz. I honestly died laughing! I couldn’t even get angry at the weirdness of it! But then it occurred to me- this is where we pray with her. Her last thoughts at night are hopefully about Jesus, and somehow in her toddler mind, this just made sense. This happened just a few weeks after we lost my precious stepmom to Covid. And somehow, in some strange way, this ministered to me. Because it meant Avery had been listening. She heard the hope I was clinging to during such grief.
Let me first say, I don’t have it all together, and I am definitely not an expert. I haven’t always been as diligent about discipling my children because I thought I had more time. But I have come to realize that is so far from the truth. There is no secret formula either; it is just striving to put into practice what Jesus modeled for us. I want to share some practical things this week that you can do with your kids while they’re young. But if you have older children, hold on- we are going there next week (and it’ll be good stuff)!
The most crucial things we can do are teaching them to pray and have a devotional time. We can start giving them tools for seeking Jesus even when they are very young. We wrongly think these are tools for “one day,” but they need them now. They are capable of using them now. Modeling spiritual disciplines with them is a great place to begin.
1. Don’t wait to pray with them.
Don’t just do it silently! Pray out loud! Even before they can form words, we can pray with them over meals and when we rock them at night. It is amazing how much they soak in. As they start talking, they can practice repeating simple prayers after you until they are ready to pray on their own. Oh my, the first time they utter their own heart-felt prayer to the Father is the best! Here is a simple model that may help them (and us) with what to say:
Tell God why He is good (Praise)
Tell God what you are thankful for today (Thanks)
Tell God anything you are sorry for (Confession)
Tell God what you need help with (Request)
One of my favorite moments in my day is the moment when my kids climb into my car and tell me all about their day. They may not always open up to me as easily, so I am soaking it up now. God also longs to hear from them about their days; He longs to have a relationship with them. And I want my children to talk to the Lord more than I want them to talk to me. They need me, but they need Him so much more. The best way they can begin to see how prayer works is by hearing my own prayers to God in times of joy, stress, sorrow, and anxiety. It’s important for us to show them that we can be honest and transparent with God. It’s important for them to hear us talking with Him because our prayers help them form a model for their own prayers.
2. Have a daily quiet time with them.
Right before we tuck our kids in at night, we sit on their beds and read through a short devotional. And we ask questions. It can be tempting to quickly read it to check it off a list, but this time is so important. We found that Parker was really absorbing what we read, and he was ready to ask awesome questions, even at a young age. If we had skipped this time with him or limited it, it could have limited the work God wanted to do in his heart, leading to his salvation. Devotionals are amazing tools, but they won’t ever breathe life into our children. Only God’s Word can do this. Reading a verse or two together will help lay a foundation of God’s Word in their hearts.
Don’t underestimate the power of your kids seeing you read the Word as well. One morning over Christmas break, I was so excited to sit down in my comfy chair with my Bible. I was tired and needed to draw on God’s Word for some strength. Right as I opened it up, Avery came over, wanting to climb in my lap and read with me. My first instinct was to tell her to wait until I was done. But the Lord reminded me of how important it is for her to see what I am doing- for her to see how important it is to my heart. And He reminded me that it’s up to me to show her how to do the same. So in my lap she went, and we read together.
God’s Word is where I want my children to turn. During the span of their lives and when I am long gone, I desperately want them to find all they need among the pages of scripture and in communicating with their Heavenly Father. When they walk through joy, blessing, disappointment, heartbreak, fear, or grief, I want them to know there is ultimate truth and comfort in all seasons through Jesus. And I am going to do all I can to point them there now, in these sweet years while they are so little and under my care. Join me. Don’t delay. Too much depends on this.
Here are a few devotionals we have used:
Louie Giglio- How Great Is Our God: 100 Indescribable Devotions About God and Science
Louie Giglio- Indescribable: 100 Devotions for Kids About God and Science
Robby Gallaty- Foundations for Kids: A 260-day Bible Reading Plan for Kids
Gospel Coalition- The New City Catechism for Kids (also a free app!)