What Eats at Us
“Jealousy leads to comparison, and it robs us of the joy in obeying what God wants from us. It leads us to question the validity of our callings, gifts, and talents because we place them next to someone else’s. And inevitably, ours feel smaller. ”
“Let us run with endurance the race that lies before us, keeping our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecterof our faith.” (Hebrews 12:1b-2a CSB).
There’s an ugly truth that we don’t like to discuss. It’s prevalent in women’s circles. And sadly, it’s really prevalent in churches.
We are jealous of one another. And it prompts all kinds of ugliness in the body of Christ. It causes division and distrust and isolation.
Although it’s super awkward and hard to admit, I’ve experienced it myself. I’ve look at other women who are running with their gifts and talents and thought, Man, I wish God would use me like that. I wish He would give me a ministry like that. What am I doing wrong? And to be more honest, I’ve experienced a jealousy that led to bitterness. It’s gross.
I’ve been on the other end too, experiencing someone else looking at something I’m doing and feeling envy in her heart—maybe even bitterness. And what I do about it doesn’t honor Jesus: I diminish the gifts He has given me to make other people feel better about themselves. I withhold things from the Lord because I am more concerned about how other people may feel.
Neither of these scenarios honors Jesus. Maybe you find yourself looking at others. You feel jealousy over the ways God is using them. Or maybe you find yourself the target of someone else’s jealousy and you’re overwhelmed with anxiety over how to fix it.
It’s no secret Moses is one of the most important people in all of scripture. He was trusted by the Lord to lead the Israelites out of slavery. He spoke with God face to face as a friend, y’all. And all Moses desired was to see God’s glory—not his own glory. Because of his leadership, Moses became the target of jealousy from his own siblings, Aaron and Miriam. They both ask, “Does the LORD speak only through Moses? Does he not also speak through us?” (Numbers 12:2 CSB). Do you hear the jealousy in their hearts? Do you sense the comparison?
As a punishment, God allows Miriam to suffer from leprosy for seven days. Her skin literally flakes off her body like snow. She had to separate herself from the community for seven days before she could be brought back in. It was ugly.
Jealousy eats away at us. It separates us from others. It weakens our community. And it’s ugly.
We need to fix our hearts.
1. We have to stop looking left to right.
I’m not much of a runner, especially racing other people. But I do know if you’re in a race, you look straight ahead as you run. If you look at the people running beside you and take your eyes off what’s ahead, it slows you down. It even causes you to lose the course. In following the Lord, we have to fix our eyes on Him instead of looking to our sides at what everyone else is doing. We fix our eyes on the “perfector of our faith.” When we spend more time fixated on how other people serve Jesus, we take our eyes off the One who deserves our attention. This is how we get ourselves in trouble and get off course. Jealousy leads to comparison, and it robs us of the joy in obeying what God wants from us. It leads us to question the validity of our callings, gifts, and talents because we place them next to someone else’s. And inevitably, ours feel smaller.
Here's the truth: nothing you do for God’s kingdom is small! He has placed you in this season, in these circumstances, in your job, in your family, in your friend group to be a light. And when you stop looking left to right, you see God more clearly. You see how He wants to use you more clearly. And the joy that comes from this is incomparable.
2. We have to use our gifts.
God has given each of us a gift (1 Peter 4:10-11) to be used for building up the body of Christ. And when you withhold that gift from Him because you’re worried about how others will respond, you’re robbing the Lord of what’s His. Use your gifts! Run with all your heart toward Jesus and use what He’s placed in your hands! Moses was described as the most humble man on earth (vs. 3). God even defends Moses to his siblings (vs. 4-9). Other people can’t see your heart, but God does. And when you serve Him in humility, you come to a place where you allow Him to defend you. You allow God to deal with those who are struggling with jealousy, and you keep serving Him and running toward Him.
3. We need to learn to cheer for others.
I have a few people who genuinely, wholeheartedly cheer me on. I want to be a cheerleader for others. If we can’t cheer on our brothers and sisters who are building God’s kingdom—if we can’t encourage our friends who are spreading Jesus’s name—something is wrong in our own hearts. When we are confident in the Lord’s will for our own lives and when we keep our eyes fixed on Him, then we can wholeheartedly cheer for those running alongside us. And it’s beautiful.
Jealousy does nothing for the kingdom. It gets us off course. It robs us of joy. So run the race God has marked out for you. And cheer like crazy for those running with you.